Grow Up.

I feel numb.

I want to feel sad,

To feel angry,

To feel happy,

To feel calm.

I want to laugh more,

To cry,

To jump,

To dance.

But I feel numb,

Like the senses in my head,

Have been damaged by the clicking sounds,

That come and go,

Hopefully becoming more mellow.

I'm not in pain,

Just in enough discomfort,

And weariness,

To help me appreciate life;

Almost every day,

I don't understand how my shoulders still hurt;

Yet I can't afford to visit a doctor,

On my own expense, that is,

Not that I am dying I suppose,

But I've lived in discomfort,

Perhaps these have numb me somewhat to others,

Because no one could understand,

And no one did really try when I told them,

But it is not their fault I know,

And these justify nothing;

In all regret to say,

Hurt people hurt people,

But I don't want to continue living this way.

Please grow up,

Me;

Yes, I hope to grow up.