The Right Time.

I walked down the bright street filled with green and red. My eyes glittered at the sight of orchids in a beautiful baby pink pot hanging out in sight from the porch of Mr. Buckerworth’s front yard. My target was just 2 blocks away; the library. Right at the cross roads separating me from the next block, I was pulled by something clinging to my left arm. My body was pushed softly towards the wall by the shoulder and I saw a hand rush to lean against the wall just next to my right ear, encaging me in its circle. I looked him in the eye, and smiled.

“Hey. You’re late. I came to pick you up.”

John said it with a crooked grin. I can’t divert my gaze from his face. He brought himself nearer to me. I could feel his breath on my skin. He leaned in to kiss my lips. I flipped my face to the right which made his kiss land on my left cheek. He chuckled.

“Not the right time yet, I see?”

“Yep. I’m waiting for the right time.”

“Okay.”

He smiled at me once more and took my right hand. I was dragged behind a skipping John toward the library. Seeing him happy makes me smile. We reached the library in no time but he didn’t let go of my hand. We took a seat at an empty table for two at the indoor café in the library. Just as the frappuccinos were served at our table, John handed me a book. It was small and tiny; about the size of my palm. It looked quite thick for its size. He asked me to read it. I opened the blank green cover and read the prologue. It thanked everybody who has helped make this book possible. As I read through familiar names, I asked John for the author.

“I wrote it.” He said smiling.

“Really?” I said, wowed.

I skipped the prologue and went to the first page of the story. It read in plain black and white of the font Calibri.

‘She walked down the hall that day in school and all the boys turned to look. They had all turned their heads back into their conversations but my eyes lingered upon her. Then she disappeared into the library. I chased after that stranger and found myself in a jungle of books. That day, I went back to class, feeling defeat as I could not find her. During lunch, she stood behind me and talked to me, asking me if the wallet on the floor was mine. I nodded with my eyes still fixed on her and slowly took the wallet out of her hands. I thanked her and invited her to sit with my group of friends. She was going to refuse the invite so I quickly offered to spend lunch with her. Seeing that I was persistent, she gave in. I felt victory by then. I tried my best to act like an ideal guy in front of her which only made her laugh in the end. I don’t know if that was a good or a bad thing. The days following after that were filled with scenes of me waiting for her after class every day. I have met her since my sophomore year but only in my senior year had I the courage to talk to her. She didn’t seem too impressed with my stalk-ish ways but she always met me with a smile. Soon enough, we became friends from acquaintances. Then good friends, close friends and became best friends. After I graduated, I continued going to the library to meet her during the weekends which was her normal routine. She looked great even in sport shoes and tracks. I would always join her for a jog after that. I even went to her church ever since even though I’ve always been to the one on the other side of the neighbourhood. After she graduated and went to college, I requested to switch to Hammerton College and University, where she was studying. On the second year of being in the same college as her, I asked her to be mine. She delightedly said yes. It lit up my night. And still does.’

I flipped the page anxiously. He was writing about me! I looked up at John and saw him smiling but looking nervous at the same time. My smile that broke out since the first sentence of the story shone back at him. I looked down at the page and continued reading with my heart feeling like butterflies landed on it.

‘We went through a lot. I remember the misunderstanding with Becky. I was holding Becky’s dress only because Freddy threw it at me! It really wasn’t me! I swear! Then the next second, she appeared to find me with the dress in my hands and Becky’s singing voice in the shower. She failed to see Freddy under the covers of the bed. The biggest mistake in my life was to open Freddy’s door, thinking of giving him one last hug before he left for Canada the next day. She walked off. She didn’t storm off, she walked off. That made me afraid. Afraid that she would walk away. I hate farewell parties anyway! I ran down to chase after her on the streets in the drizzle.

‘Wait! It’s not what it seemed!’

‘That’s what they all say!’ she said, crying but trying to hide it, her face blaming the rain.

‘Give me 1 minute to explain! ONE minute!’

’59, 58, 57…’ she counted down the minute in sobs.

I explained it to her, stammering all the way and called Freddy to explain. I gave her the phone and she listened attentively. Then she gave the phone back to me and walked off, heading home.

‘Don’t you believe me?’ I screamed to her back, hoping she could hear me from that distance.

She didn’t turn back and continued walking on. I texted and called her for 3 whole days with no reply. Was this the silent treatment? On the fourth day, she called my phone.

‘I’m sorry. I trust you. I don’t trust her.’ She sighs ‘I’m sorry.’

‘I love you.’ I said.

She cried on the other end. ‘Me too.’

After that, every day felt like heaven had landed on our planet. I did get jealous sometimes when other guys would hug her to greet her. Isn’t a wave enough? I mean, I wave to girls who are not my girlfriend so why can’t you do it, pal? But right now, right here, where our memories are most vivid in this café, our nostrils filled with the scent of our favourite drink and favourite person, I have something to say. I’ve been thinking about this for a while now.’

I flipped the page with my heart pumping at the speed of light. A blank page. I looked up at John. He motioned his hand for me to continue reading. I looked at the blank page and flipped to the next page. Another white page. I flipped and flipped and flipped nervously till I stumbled upon an extraordinary discovery. My eyes shone in bewilderment as I looked at the ring, hidden in a hole cut out of 10 pages or so, cellophane taped to the back cover of the book. A note stood beside it in the hole and I took it and opened it. It read

‘This may sound a little cliché, but you are the love of my life. I’m going to ask this question for the second time but a little differently. Julia, will you be forever mine?’

I looked up at John, almost in tears. He was kneeling with his left knee touching the floor and holding a bouquet of orchids in his left arm, offering the other hand. I took his hand and he rose along with me. My chair slid back and I placed the book on the table and jumped into his arms. He was forced to throw the bouquet in his chair to catch me in his embrace. The people around clapped for us.

‘No wonder mom and dad’s name were in it.’

‘Yes, I’ve gotten their blessing. So, what’s your answer?’

‘I thought it was obvious.’

‘But I want to hear it from you.’

‘Yes!’ I said it with my biggest smile ever.

His lips reached for mine but I stopped them with my fingers. The right time for me was when we got married. He understood. When we got back to our seats, he placed the ring on my finger. I was now engaged to John Miller. My heart leapt for joy!

We decided to have our wedding the autumn after this coming one. It was already summer and everything was so bright and sunny. We spent the first three months looking for the right place, theme, outfits, and making up a list of who to invite. We were going to have it in a garden, the big garden of Karoupe, right in the centre of town. It’s not like a park. It was much more beautiful than anything green you’ve ever seen! The theme was white and baby pink. We picked out our wedding outfits and took many pictures! We decided to invite our immediate families and a few close friends only. It was going to be simple and beautiful. Both of us loved nature.

Just a week before the wedding! We’re so excited. We talked everyday about the future. We wanted many children. We wanted to live in a two-storey house with a garden in the front yard. We planned to save up money to buy a piano and teach our kids how to play many musical instruments and bring them out for sports. We’d attend the nearest church. We’d compile many pictures of our children as they grow up.

I walked down the streets, pass Mr. Buckerworth’s house towards the library to meet my groom-to-be to read up on marriage; just in case. I could see him a block away, waiting across the street, leaning on a pole in front of the white background of the library. I waved at a gazing John whose eyes were fixed on me. I could see his smile 10 meters away from me. He ran across the street with an impatient look.

BAM!

My eyes widened with tears as I watched his body fly 2 feet away and the motorcycle flipping and landing on him. I rushed towards him. His body lay on the floor, almost motionless. A motorcycle had come out of nowhere. I couldn’t see it! Why didn’t I see it! If only I walked faster, then I could see beyond the block! WHY! WHY! I held him in my arms, begging him not to die; not to leave me. He held my right hand with his right hand. He kept whispering ‘I love you. I love you.’

The ambulance finally arrived. I wished the vehicle would move faster than 100 km/hour since the road was so damn clear! I held his hand all the way to the emergency room while he lay on the trolley bed. I replied ‘I love you too. I love you too’ from the scene to the entrance of the room where we were forced to let go of each other.

He had a puncture to his stomach due to the piercing of the broken mirror of the motorcycle when it landed on him. He also received a huge blunt blow to his head with the motorcycle’s heavy weight. I don’t want to lose John. The red light bulb outside the emergency room came alive.

Meanwhile, I went to check on the motorcyclist. I couldn’t sit still. John was in danger. The motorcyclist only had scratches. I went back slowly to the ER. I waited on the seat outside. Our parents had arrived then. I cried so much that I fell asleep on the hospital seat.

I woke up and looked at the light bulb. It was off! I asked my dad beside me where they took John. He was placed in the ICU. I raced myself to the ward and saw everybody crowded around him, talking solemnly and praying. I stood in front of his bed and cried when I saw his pale face. He asked everyone to leave. I kneeled beside his bed.

‘I haven’t got years. They say that I’m in critical condition.’ John said while wheezing, using all his breath to speak to me.

‘Don’t talk. You WILL live. You can’t leave me now. We’re getting married.’

He wiped my tears and smiled.

‘I know. I’m sorry I can’t be there. If you find someone else who loves you, take him in my place.’

‘No. No, I won’t’

‘Is this the right time?’

I breathed in my mucus. ‘The right time for what?’

And a sudden realization hit me.

I grabbed his face gently and kissed the pale lips of the man I loved. When I withdrew, he smiled, said ‘I love you’ once more and breathed his last.

We had his funeral in the garden and cremated him so I could keep his ashes in my home. I continued living with my parents and never loved again. Every day, I think of him. I would always read back the little green book he gave me and recall sweet memories from the ring still on my finger. ‘I love you too’ I’d whisper.